When my dear friend, Catalina, asked me to write a piece on self care for mothers, my immediate thought was no sweat I can write that in a second. Then I began to go through the list of typical self care items we moms crave:
- Take a long uninterrupted shower
- Get a mani and pedi
- Eat amazing meal that you don’t have to cook yourself
- Sweat, practice yoga, running, spinning whatever moves you
- Get a good haircut and blow-dry
- Shopping therapy
I could have easily written a blog post with the top 10 self care activities to do for your self like have warm lemon water every morning, but we have all heard all of that before. As I continued to go through this mental laundry list, I kept hearing the voices of the beautiful mamas that attend our Mother’s Healing Circle begging me to go deeper into the topic of self care…
“What we truly need the most is Time Alone”
Yes, ALONE. That means no children, no husband, no one….completely ALONE.
As mothers we constantly run around taking care of every minuscule detail of our family’s lives. My mother jokingly said today that I was my toddler’s secretary. I keep track of his calendar, make sure he makes all of his appointments on time and yes I know where Paw Patrol, Lightning McQueen and Mater figurines are at all times, not to mention random Lego pieces he loves and Rafa his favorite lovey to sleep with.
I have an almost 3 year old and a 5 month old that I adore and occupy all of my energy. At our house by the time we are done with “Bed, Bath and Beyond” as my midwife calls it, my husband and I have our dinner, talk about our day and attempt to watch Netflix and chill before baby wakes up to nurse again… The same cycle repeats itself everyday and most days I love our little routine but other days are not so smooth.
What I crave more than anything else is just time to be myself to reconnect with myself. Rather than waiting for the moment where you can actually get away to go that class or go get your nails done, make time everyday for yourself.
Create a space at home where you can retreat for just 5 or 10 minutes, put the phone down and sit in silence. Once you are able to sit in silence, breathe and just see what happens, what thoughts come. Let the UNIVERSE speak to you. All that you need is there if you are willing to listen. The woman you are beyond all the hats you wear is there calling you, beckoning you to acknowledge her wisdom and beauty. Once you find her, just let the magic unfold.
From my heart to yours…